Thursday, 18 May 2017

Entering Another Phase Of Life


Next week, Irfan dah daftar university untuk further diploma. Tak payah nak 'further' sangat la, memang semua orang akan amik diploma/matriks/asasi pun..

( And aku kat sini masih struggle untuk SPM hahaha. In fact, aku rasa macam ada gap yang sangat besar between student universiti dan SPM. Padahal, tua 8 bulan je kan fan ? )

Aku wonder juga la, how it's going to be like.. Sebab different university, different students, different surrounding, so you must gain a different experience kan. So, entering another phase of life literally will change us to be a new person ( will you ?)

Contohnya, if you go somewhere for a long time. Lepastu, dah bercaampur dengan suasana kat sana, gaya percakapan semua dah adapt dalam diri , sedikit sebanyak mesti kita akan berubah kan.

To be really really really honest, aku berat hati nak ubah mindset 'irfan has grown and he's a freshman now' . Agak susah, tapi aku tau by hook or by crook aku kena adapt juga dengan perubahan ni sebab hidup ni sentiasa berubah. (tahun depan izz myy turnnnz !!)

Seriring dengan hipotesis ni :

Semakin meningkat masa, semakin meningkat tahap kehidupan seseorang. 

Tapi, will you change fan? Aku faham tak ada apa yang boleh guarantee yang dia akan steady macam tu je, At least 2% you will.. But I hope that's not much to compare with the old you.

I'm being sho emotional HAHAHA lek la zati.. Okay I'll try to be cool. ehem..

By the way, disebabkan dia tak bagi aku pos surat mahupun apa apa yang berkaitan. Maka, aku pun tak tahu nak cakap panjang panjang kat mana, so here's the place! Hmm, so I think that's all.

And here's the nota penting untuk sesiapa nak berkenalan dengan irfan secara jinak jinak burung merpati, merah merah buah tomato, irfan yang baik hati, boleh la bagi nombor telefon kat sini.. :

Beware, I'm watching you.

(where ever u go. hohohoho)

Friday, 5 May 2017



Sometimes I feel like I am at my lowest point where as I am truly exhausted. Until at a moment, I just want to sujood and hoping that everything will heal by itself when I wake up.

That's the only way that I can do to lighten my burden - through duas in sujood. I believe, at  this moment friends and family can't help much. I know Allah SWT is all hearing. He even knows my deepest heart voice.

“Say (O Muhammad): ‘If I am astray, I only stray to the loss of my own soul: but if I receive guidance, it is because of what my Lord reveals to me. He is All-Hearing, Ever-Near’.” [SÅ«rah Saba’: 50] 

Reflecting back to my early life when I came to Selangor. - everything wasn't come easily. Allah SWT has given me and my sister a lots of trials. I even can't remember each incident that happens in our lives.

The toughest part was taking care of my sister when she's sick. How'd you feel when someone you love is sick ? I'm not sure if it's only me who feels anxious,  restless, unease , worry. That affects me physically and mentally.

Seeing her laying on the bed and unable to do anything. Even talk and eat... Really makes me feel depressed.

I love her and it is so heartbreaking to see her like this.

Plus, I have no one to share my burden with. I mean, at that moment, when something happens to my sister. There's no one with me. And every time that happens, I'm like a fool.

 ''What should I do ?''

'' Who should I call ?''

My mom isn't staying with me. I'm staying with my sister, so that happens almost every month.. I don't know if psychologically that affect my mental health also hahaha..


Praised to Allah SWT because He chose me among the other siblings or all the Muslims. He loves me and He wants to keep me on the right path. Alhamdulillah.

Other than sujood. I believe in this ayat too:

Where ever am I, what ever am I doing or in what situation I'm facing. I believe this ayat can gives me strength. It can cure my insecurities, stress and nervousness.

It's like showing the power of Almighty Allah SWT. He's the only one can help us in any situations.
He's the only one can protect us and we can depend on Him any time. SubahanAllah..

You can refer here for more information : duas

Have you ever feel so terrible when someone you love fall sick ?